Our CNY in Kluang & The City of the Merlion

It was a great trip back home to Kluang for the past 3 days 2 nights. Actually, we were there for just 2 days. 1 of the day was spent in Singapore. Since everyone (my uncles & aunties) has already left after the CNY holiday, we are left with pretty much, nothing to do. Of course, except for mahjong la... but that's beside the point. So, spontaneously/adhocly/last minute-ly, we decided to make a day trip to the city of the Merlion, i.e. Singapore, the following day.

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We also visited an Aunt of ours who just had an appendicities' ops in a hospital. All is well for her, thank God. :) May she get well soon.

(she requested me to keep her identity anonymous)

Met up with a friend of ours' in town later that day. She brought me to this Kuan Yin's temple (goddess of mercy) on Waterloo Street which according to her, is very 'ling' (accurate & will grant wishes). When she warned me that in the event if we got separated, we shall wait in front of the temple; I thought she was joking. I almost laugh out loud, till I saw how packed it really was, I listened to her attentively (at that moment, I forgot that modern technology called handphone...).

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So off we went, into the temple. Amidst hundreds of men & women, girls & boys, standing or kneeling, I offered some flowers and burning joss sticks and said my prayers. I even did that bamboo thingy and got a good 'chim'. Seriously, the 'ling-ness' of the temple had me slightly taken aback. The aura I felt while I was there and the answer to my prayer were so detailed.

From the temple, we took a cab to Takashimaya cause I wanna find some really nice dinner dresses. Found one that I fell head over heels with, gold satin beneath an ornamented black organza. I practically drooled over it. But thought better of it. I didn't buy it cause i can't bear to part with my S$170 (RM400). Sad la... but nevermind la... see how it goes first. If I really can't eat or sleep without it, then maybe I'll go buy la... lols (that's my acid test for buying expensive stuff)...lols

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As mahjong has been the highlight for these past couple of days, when I saw these cute mahjong cupcakes at Taka, I can't resist to snap a photo of it eventhough displeasure were plastered all over the face of the minder. Unfortunately, it didnt turn out well. Somehow, the character on top disappeared. Over exposed. Actually, it has 'fatt choy', 'pak pan', 'hung zhung' & etc. I wanted to snap again but the sales lady kinda like glaring at me when I told her I just wanna snap a picture of it... hahahaha :p who cares anyway... not as if she made those cupcakes...:p

Later that night, we had dinner at this little restaurant in Pasir Ris called something Breeze. The ambience were fantastic, it was set right by the shore. Other than the nice dinners, the soothing sound of lapping waves, the strong cool breeze hitting our faces, the lovely company, the overall setting, it was so...nice. If it is not for we have to go back to Kluang the same night, we would have ordered some wine, and absorb in the romantic atmosphere :-) We shall go there again next time.

Earlier, on our way to Singapore, after dropping my cousin off at another cousin's house in JB (cause he didnt have his passport with him), we dropped by to visit my JB's grandma. She was happy to see us. She is a tiny old lady and we look so gigantic next to her.

As I mentioned earlier, that mahjong has been the highlight of our this trip back home to Kluang, it was all because that the other 2 days that we are in Kluang, we busied ourselves with mahjong.. hehehe... We only play once a year and it is really fun. Especially fun for me this year cause for the first time in my life, I won in mahjong!!! It's worth to note it here cause I don't know when will it happen again next... lols. So here's a photo to share. There is no big deal in the card formation here. Just that, I got no flowers, so, however way I formed it, I'll win 'pit' (max). Best part is, I've so many such cards!!! Heng le...... :) - As I kept on winning, a mischievious grinning PP's face popped into my mind. I couldn't help but had a feeling that she got something to do with it.

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So that basically sum up our CNY in Kluang. Though it is our first year without PP, it was alright. I believe it is just a matter of time. Soon, before we know it, we would have gotten used to not having her around.

My CNY in KL

Gong Hei Fatt Choy to you all who are celebrating CNY. I bet everyone celebrates CNY in Malaysia, cause we are Malaysian. We Malaysian celebrates Christmas, Deepavali, Hari Raya, Wesak, CNY... So, happy holiday guys... :)

(Chrysanthenum flowers which I bought for our house in Taman Desa)

Our CNY was spent at Maseira with Harrison's parents, my in-laws. This is my first CNY as a daughter-in-law and as a wife. Also means, this is our first time to distribute angpow. It was kinda fun. Besides distributing, we also received quite a number of angpow. Apparently, we still can accept angpow on the first CNY after kahwin. At least can recover a bit... lucky wor...

I gotten the flu bug on the eve of CNY. Other than the standard CNY activities, I am most of the time, resting in the room. Even for fireworks, which I loved so very much, I was too lazy to run out to enjoy it. Luckily for me, there was one bursting right outside our room's balcony. It was so beautiful.

I've never felt so disconnected from the world before for the past couple of days. No matter what we tried, we just don't seems to be able to log onto the world wide web. So cham.

(my useless laptop sitting at the corner of the room)

Relatives came to visit on the first day of CNY. We had nice vegetarian lunch together. After which, we went to several temples in town to pray. At one of this particular temple in Petaling Street, I've never seen so many beggars at one time. When Harrison told me earlier to prepare some coins for the beggars, I thought he was joking. Mana tau, really one. There are easily more than 20 of them and most of the are healthy people with legs and hands. Sigh... nevermind la... I distributed the coins I brought to all of them.

(me lepaking outside our room's balcony)

On the second day, all the office staff came to visit. The kids had hell of a good time sliding down the grass slope in the garden while their parents have fun chit chatting & munching down all the cookies. It was nice. I can remember all their names by now.

(Some other plants I bought for our house in Taman Desa. Nice)

We came back to our own home today and invited some friends over for dinner. I cooked some simple stuff (but ended up having too much meat :p). I bought no one gets any food poisoning... hehehe.... After dinner, we played blackjack. I lost RM60. But then, what's new? I never win at gamble before (except for the year my mom got her heart attack). How to win la like that? But nevermind la... it was fun. The kids have fun too running around jumping on the sofa. hehehhehe....:) It was a really pleasant evening.

(dig in)

(terri brought this blueberry cake)

Will be going back to Kluang tomorrow to visit my family. Will try to get more photos to share when I get back...;) Bye

A Day Out To Cheer Myself (and to shiok sendiri)

Tears still well-ed up in my eyes whenever I thought of PP. I am a little slow in some things sometimes. I get sad couple of days after the day it happened. Or if I dont get sufficient sleep tonight, I will probably only feel tired 2 days later. Weird right? Don't ask me how come like that... cause I memang like that one.

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I guess all the emotions that had been held up so well couple of days ago are crumbling down now. It's like being hit by a tsunami. It's like being overcome by a sudden tidal wave of sadness. It felt like my heart has been blasted into a million pieces. No, not like that. More like my heart being dipped into icy cold water and that it shrunk into the size of a pea. That's how.

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Like how I have always overcome my sadness or grief, I start doing happy things or see pretty stuff. I guess as more and more happiness accumulated in my heart, there will be less space for grief.

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So, I decided to go out and have a fun filled night early this evening with a friend of mine, Terri. I believe she would be the only one that I can think of, that will entertain my nonsense during these busy pre-CNY days. True enough, she is ON.

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We had our makeover done at Kose's promotion counter instead of STAGE which was initially planned due to some reasons which are too long to elaborate. Anyway, we both loved our photos so much that we have to find somewhere nice to have a nice dinner so that we can sit down comfortably and be mesmerised by our own good look. In short, 'shiok sendiri' la....

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We ended up at Italianese and ordered ourselves a nice dinner as well as some wine. All in all, I am not sure about Terri, but I, for sure, did had a great time. We have concluded that we should do this perasan thingy twice a year. So the next session would be in June. :) Let's just see if we have gone uglier or prettier then...lols.

A Tribute To A Figment Of My Memory

(Our most recent family photo taken on 7th June 08, right before she fell ill in Aug)

Heartfelt thanks for all the condolences. If you did not received a personal 'thank you' sms from me, I wish to take this opportunity to thank once again, all those of you who have send condolence sms. Thank you very much.

(a monochromatic Samsung)

I was stucked with a 'mono' colour old mobile phone for the past few days cause my own ran out of battery and it's kinda hard to re-learn the function of a 'dinosour-age' phone. If you did received my replies, it is most probably all in CAPS, and just to let you know I am not shouting. It's just that I don't know how to un-cap it. When I replied one of Harrison's sms, he asked, 'what's with the capital???'. I replied, 'I don't know how to use the fucking phone' and he replied that I put a smile on his face. I think he is a bit ku-ku... Anyway, whatever it is, the phone has been my saviour to be connected to the outside world (this sentence is meant for Unc Lester cause the spare phone belongs to him). Must be appreciative... :p

(this is how she look whenever she up to some mischief)

The past few days since PP's passing, it has been nothing but choas despite of we kind of already expected it to happen. We spent some time by PP's side after she took her last breath, before an undertaker was called upon. After that, all that I remembered was everything about the funeral - the prayer ceremony, incense, paper house & misc offerings, drinks, collection of pak kum, mourning attire, breakfast lunch dinner + supper arrangement, payments and etc... I took it upon myself to handle all these cause mom is kinda in her own world, she need time to grief.

On that faithful morning, I was rudely awaken by a loudy banging on our room door... "gladys...! gladys...! quick....!". All I remembered was, I practically sprinted out from the bed over Harrison, to PP's room groggily. PP's eyes were wide opened (which is rare these days) as if she was surprised. At that moment, I wasn't exactly sure what it was all about. I thought it was because PP was awake, that's why. Only when I noticed how heavily she was breathing, the thought of her time is up crossed my mind. There I stood, by her side, helding her hand and patting it gently at the same time telling her to let go and be at peace. That we'll all be alright and not to worry about us. Also, I told her... "PP... don't be afraid. Peng2 is here. All will be alright. Just go if you need to"... (Peng2 is my pet name called by my family) couple of seconds later, she let out her last breath.

(relaxing while we sorting out the wedding details)

It was a good farewell for me. I am both happy and sad. Happy cause her suffering finally ended and sad cause we have to learn to live our life without her from now on. It all seems so surreal that she have been bed-ridden for the last couple of months. All that I can remember is all the happy moments together. The holidays we took, the places we went, the joke we shared, the look on her face when she is up to some mischief like hiding my stuff, or tickling me when I am asleep.

(we always teased her of her nutty proffesor's hairstyle....)

I believed that in life, we don't need to try too hard sometimes. Whatever that is meant to be, will be. All these while, I have been worrying that she will passed away alone without having any family members by her side. It torn my heart just thinking about it. But somehow, strangely, of all her 33 descendants, I am one of the selected few that has the opportunity. I am just so glad.

(PP's siblings)

PP has always been a very strong person. From the day she was born, till the day she passed away. She is the fourth among her 6 siblings. When she was born 75 years ago, she was left under the bed to die. Cause she is a daughter and times were really bad then. She survived.

(together with her babies)

After she was married to my grandfather, life was hard too. They were very poor and were struggling to bring up 6 children. I remembered she once have to steal a can of condensed milk just so that she can dilute it in water to feed her children. PP worked very hard to help my grandfather in whatever way she could to make a living. My grandfather would carry his curry noodle stall over his shoulder during the day and PP would set up a stall by the street at night to sell fried kuoy teow. All that I can say is that, thoughout her lifetime, through all the hardship, she never once complain. She would just work and work. Despite of all these, she still managed to keep the house tidy and sparkling clean. That's my PP.

(PP smiling happily enjoying the atmosphere of our wedding day)

Life got better eventually. I still remembered how I ended up in Kluang and not Singapore. Mom was divorced when I was barely 1 year old. She was struggling to take care of me and work at the same time in Singapore. On one our faithful visit to my grandparents in Kluang when I was about 4 years old, in the evening, at my grandparents' hawker stall, when we were about to go back to Singapore, PP said to me, "why not you stay here with me, I'll take you to the playground everyday". That's how I ended up in Kluang. The 'playground'. Since that evening, every evening for a month I think, PP never failed to take me to the playground.

(I love this one)

When I was in primary school, every Saturday morning, still in her pyjamas, she would drive me to school for POL class (chinese subject). When the class is over, I would find her waiting for me at the carpark underneath a huge canopy tree, fully make-up and dressed in one of her pretty dress. We would then go to her favourite hair salon and have her hair done nicely. Despite of her hectic schedule, she always find time for facials & doing up her hair. Or whenever we go out, she never failed to put some make up on. Those days, she uses only Shiseido & Kanebo ok..no joke. Even after when she gotten her first stroke and her hands were feeble, she would still apply foundation, pressed on powder, pink rouge on her cheeks, eyebrows, eyeshadows and lipstick. I remember how I used to touch up for her, whatever that went offline, whenever she is here to visit. Yes, we gather that she is vain, and we got it from her. Cause we are equally vain.

(3 generations - 2 mothers, 2 daughters)

She used to love going to the cinema too. She would finished off whatever work she needs to do as early as possible, and go for a movie. After that, we would go to this alley next to the cinema for Uncle Tu Tu's yong tau foo (he is known as Tu Tu, dont ask me why...). It was nice. She loves fishballs, kangkung, cuttlefish & fried pork skin.

I am very much like PP. We are similar in many ways. Maybe cause we are together most of the time, somehow, my likes influence hers' or vice versa. I love the cakes at 'Milky Way' cake shop, so does she. I love sweet & sour pork & lemon chicken, she too. She loves everything to be in order and neat, so did I. She loves to throw out unneccesary junks, so did I.
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Our PP is a very easy going person. Not fussy at all. She will eat whatever we ordered. She will go wherever we brings her. She would wear whatever we bought for her. I remembered how one of my aunty would always buy really bright colour clothes for her and she would frown, but she will still wears it. I once bought her a piece of cloth with leopard print, and she got it made into a samfu. She loves it.

For the past couple of months, eventhough everything else in her body was giving up, her heart still beats so very strongly. Despite of just being fed nutrient milk through her nose, she survived 4 long months. Like I said, she was a strong woman, right from the start, till the end.
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We have lots of good happy memories spent with her. Like our Genting trip 14 years ago where she bought me a teddy that I loved. Or when we were strolling by Lake Toba 18 years ago looking at small fishes. Or when we were laughing histerically in a farmhouse in Perth in 1995 when a friend who never used a camera in her entire life were asked to snap a photo of us. Or when she joined us for a swim in the pool during the 1993's Christmas spent at Cornwall Garden. The one that she enjoyed the most was the Virgo Cruise which we went couple of years ago. We wheeled her all over the cruise and she loved it. Or when I covered her greys with henna mixture which she insisted that it was too thick, I went on anyway. She just laughed. It was nice. Really nice.

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After her passing, still on her bed, mom called the regular Malay nurse who used to clean & changes PP's wounds' dressing to inform her of the demised. The kind nurse came to the house shortly, removed and cleaned all wounds. She even reapply medicine on PP's bedsore and cover it with a new dressing. We were all very grateful. Nurses like her are very rare these days. May God bless her kindness.

Mom & one of my aunty wiped & cleaned her after that. They dressed her in one of her favourite clothes underneath the gold colour longevity robes which the undertaker brought. She looks so serene & peaceful. Freed of all her sufferings finally. Instead of having the undertaker doing her make up, mom & I did it for her. Just the way she likes it. She looked so pretty.

Rest In Peace PP

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On a bright sunny morning, with gentle cool breeze, our beloved PP has passed on to another new beginning, at 10:15am, with us by her side helding her hand, comforting her and gently nudging her to move on.

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Rest in peace PP, may God be with you. We love you.

***

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p/s: pls do not send flowers or money but donate to a good cause under her name, Mdm Fong Ah Noi.

CNY Cookies

I baked some CNY cookies.

Oatmeal cookies baking in the oven.

Oatmeal cookies & almond snaps.

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The oatmeal cookies is perfect. The almond snaps on the other hand is a little too thick. Better next time. I still need to bake some peanut butter cookies & chocolate chips cookies.

Then we are set for CNY.

Midnight Ice Cream Outing

One fine night, when the moon is round and big, I had a hiccup attacked. A bad & huge hiccup attacked that lasted 6 hours and more.

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According to some old wives tales, solution to a hiccup would be to drink as much water as possible. I basically drowned myself with a whole bottle of water throughout the evening. My stomach felt so bloated but my hiccups persist. Then, I told Harrison, the only way to rid that nasty hiccups would be ice creams. Guess what... he said, let's get change. :D

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So, at 1:03am, we on our way to the A&W along Fed Highway... as for my hiccups, by the mentioned of the word 'ice-creams', it stopped mirculously. We went anyway, just in case it comes back :)

We ordered ourselves a nice ice cream waffer. I wanted to snap a photo of the nice yummy waffle. Only after we have chomped it down that I remembered about the photo. So, I took one of the brochure instead :p

This is what we had. It was yummy. It was nice to drive out at that hour of the day. The air was cool, there's no traffic. Perfect. Anyway, whenever there is ice creams at the end of the tunnel, it's perfect anyway.

Christianity Vs The Law Of Attractions

I met with this friend the other day. He recently accepted Christ and became a Christian already la... So we had a drink & chit chatted. Somehow we got into the topic of dogs (he has one too - we ppl with no children talks only about dogs and other things. Never about babies).

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Anyway, as we were talking, I decided to tell him about how I had wished for Husky.... and how I got exactly what I wished for. Hau lian (show off) a bit la that I got super power. Then I went on telling him about positive thinking and that if we wished for something, and want it hard enough, we'll get it.

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Him: Do you always get what you wished for?

Me: Yeah.. not all the time, but most of the time la..

Him: Then God must have really love you.

Me: *Blur + Eyes popping out*

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So I told him, I am not against his God and that I come in peace... lols.. The thing is, we must always have faith in ourselves. If you have that, your dreams will come true and whatever you wish for will manifest itself (I learned the word 'manifest' from my friend Gerry).

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Him: But sometimes people do get what they wished for. Just that they didn't know God manifest it for them.

Me: *mouth zipped + popped eyes hanging down nose*

Him: We are all God's children. Daughters & sons. God is like our Father. If we pray for something, a Father will definitely answer His children's wishes.

Me: oo.. uhuh.

***

The thing is, sigh... all I can say is, when you believe that your God will grant your wishes, you believed. So, with your believing, you are so positive that you will get what you wished for. If you believe God will get you a 5-series, you will start imagining your finger caressing it's sexy steering cruising up Genting Highlands. If you believe hard enough, it will somehow manifest cause you will be so motivated towards it. It's simply known as the law of attractions. The likes attract the likes. If you have the slightest doubt, it wont work. You just gotta believe.

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Anyway, my boss & I had a chat this afternoon on our way out to lunch regarding this and we concluded that it is like this... "GOD HELP THOSE WHO HELP THEMSELVES". How very true. If we just sit at home believing god will bestowed upon us abundance without us lifting a finger... can? (or maybe its possible, i don't know. You may need really strong Positive thoughts) But then again, we still need to create opportunities for God to manifest our wishes right? He can't be raining down gold or money right? (ACA will question him).

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That reminds me of something I heard over a movie. About a man stranded in the middle of the sea and held on to a piece of drifting wood. He prayed to God to save him. A moment later, a boat passes by and offered help but the man say 'no thank you'. Then he prayed again for God to save him. When another boat came by, once again he said 'no thank you'. Hours passes and there is no other boats come to his rescue and in a moment of frustration, he asked, 'God, why didn't you save me?'. Then God appeared and said... "I sent you 2 boats you dumb dumb"...

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You get what I mean? Whatever la... I also not sure what I am blabbering. These days my thoughts seems to be jumbled up in one tight knot. Siow (mad) already I think...

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p/s: why are we hardly hear a Buddhist imposing their beliefs on others but constantly of a Christianity preacher? Enlighten me please.

Hair Cut = Happy Hormones?

I was chatting with a friend over msn and we were talking about my new hair cut. Of course she said my short hair looks good, at least something new rather than the previously forever long hair. I think so too.

As we were chatting, I was telling her something about how going to get my hair done for a new hairstyle felt kinda destressing. You know, it is like if you have some problems, whether you are angry or sad or depressed or stressed, by having your hair restyled, it felt kinda like getting rid of all the 'suay' (unlucky/problems) and somehow, after that whole process, we kinda emerged fresh and brand new. It's like everything are wiped clean. All troubles gone.

This friend of mine, totally agreed about the feeling. She felt that way too. The conclusion is, besides exercising, a hair cut too produces the feel good feeling - i.e. endorphine. How many of you felt the same? If you feel like shit, go get a hair cut. It will make you feel better.

CNY Shopping - Clothing (done)

I did it. I bought 3 dresses, 1 skirt, 1 blouse, 2 belts and 3 pairs of shoes for less than RM500 after friendship's discount. It has been such a long time since I last shopped like that. Anyway, I love the shoes so much :)

(this is one of the shoe I bought. casual one)

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The best part of the whole experience is, I don't need to wait for ages for a fitting room, or that I have to wrestle with someone for something I fancy. I can pick & choose for as long as I like or tried as much clothes as I wish. Nice right? It is like as if I own the place...ok ok... I got a little carried away there.
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It's nice to shop like that once in awhile. No need to yell, no need to fight, just shop leisurely and followed by a nice yumcha session with the boss. How else wonderful can it get?

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Oh, another thing is, I got my hair trimmed even shorter today. Addicted to hair cutting :p I think it look better now. It was kinda weird the last time. Don't worry, it cant get any shorter than this now.

CNY in Mid Valley & Home

Was at MidValley over the weekend. CNY deco is already up. Here are some photos to share. This pink one is in Garden City. There was a chinese troupe playing out some CNY's songs when we were there.

This one here, with red deco is at the center court of MidValley. Nice hor...

In exactly 12 days it will be CNY. I haven't bought anything yet. Anything as in CNY goodies like packet drinks, tid-bits, mandarin oranges and etc. As for new clothing, also nothing yet.

***

As in tradition, year after year a very good friend of mine who is involved in clothing business will settled this part of problem for me. I am not a 'new clothes for CNY' person. I hate the crowd at the malls during this festive season and I hate the idea of bumping into someone wearing exactly the same shirt I bought for CNY (as you know, everyone will be shopping for CNY, so it is inevitable that another 100 person will be buying exactly the same thing as us).

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I am not fussy with clothing. So year after year, this good friend of mine will insist that we have to at least wear something new; preferably red, for CNY to ensure good luck. So whenever she goes for her last minute CNY shopping, she never fail to grab something red for me. So, as time goes, i somehow relied on her to settle my CNY wardrobe issues. This year, unfortunately for me (fortunate for her), business is so busy that she havent got the time to pick out stuff for me. She asked me to get them at their other outlet which is nearer to my place... but I am still lazy. Will probably go later after delivering some stuff to a customer in town.

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Other than that, I supposed to go to the market this morning to get some 'pussy willows' (harrison is so tickled by the name of it) but I can't wake up in time despite Harrison kicking me couple of times (I told him to kick till I wake up this morning). Also, I don't have a big vase for it. I need to solve the vase problem first then only my waking up issue.

***

Seriously, I am really not in the mood but still have to do it cause afterall, this is the first year that we are celebrating CNY as husband and wife. Whatever it is, must have a little of festive mood at home. Am not in the mood cause yesterday, the doctor at the hospital told mom to take PP home and that she have less than two weeks to live. Despite it being a good news (cause that will ease PP's suffering), somehow it is still a sad news. How festive can that piece of news be?

My Favourite Wall

This was my favourite wall in Court 9. I remembered how 6 years ago, I couldn't wait till the next morning to hang up the newly bought frames, I hammered the nails into the wall at 1:00am in the morning. Thank god no one complain. (I am not so kind though... I remembered how I used to call the security when some mad people living below would hammer and knock at 2:30am...:p)

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I've always loved this wall. Especially how the curtain, basket and flowers jived. I didn't plan it that way, it just so happen that I don't have a vase for the flowers and there is this red basket sitting in the store room doing nothing. Might as well.

***

Anyway, back to my favourite wall. It was decorated with memories in myriad shapes & colours of frame filled with photos of friends who are close to heart, photos of parties at home, photos of my family (parents, cousins, grandparents), photos of important events in my life - pageant, dancing, getting drunk... and all.
***

I packed up all my memories last Friday when I was back in Court 9 and stored them neatly in a box. I gotta clear all my stuff since I know longer staying there. Gone are those wild crazy party days where all that I cared for are boozes & parties. I was at this annual dinner last night. The sight of young punks downing glass and glass of whisky makes me sick. Waste of good alcohol isn't it?

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It's nice to walk down memory lane once in a while. That chapter of my life is closed now and another chapter is beginning. I bet it's gonna be as fabulous as the last.

Needy Orphanage

Recently an email has been circulating around regarding a poor orphanage that is in dire need of assistance to fund the school going children.

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Together with a bunch of good hearted people, the first step of a fund raising event to build a suitable home for the children was set. We had a meeting last Tuesday to discuss the details of how to go about it.

Each of us were allocated different responsibility and mine was to speak to the Social Welfare Department to find out the status of this orphanage as well as to enquire about the procedure to go about for a fund raising event.

***

Unfortunately, the orphanage issue got blown up too much and now political parties are getting involved. Involved from A~Z. That's left us nothing much to do ... :p We'll probably just have to sit back and wait if our services is required. I am just kidding.. Seriously, we'll just wait for the next meeting to decide what should we do. To proceed or abort.

***

Anyway, I can't blabber my thoughts out now. Am watching 'Sex & The City', third season, and my stomach is growling so loud that I cant really hear the conversation of the show . Am thinking of a cheese burger or maybe even a big mac, but too lazy. Think I gonna just make myself a maggie. And of course with eggs.

Yes? No? Can? How?

It's strange. I don't seems to have anything to blog about this entire week. Kind of like going thru some mental block or something. Just don't feel like blogging. Absolutely nothing to blabber.

***

I was startled from my slumber this morning by a phone call from my mom. She confirmed the worst. The doctor wants to amputate both of PP's feet. How sad can that be? It is the worst cause I would rather received news of her passing than this. Judging from PP's condition, there is no way that she will recover. Her sugar level can no longer be controlled by insulin. Her average glucose reading is 16. Her kidneys is giving way and she is totally paralysed. She would probably have another month or two (I think). What's the point of putting her thru another trauma? Another agonising pain?

***

According to the doctor, if we do not wish to go ahead with the amputation, PP will be discharged from the hospital as there is nothing more the doctors can do. The doctor also suggested that we should put PP up in a nursing home cause there will be qualified nurses to take care of her and tend to her wounds.

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The thing is, being a Chinese and raised with all the filial piety values, it is hard for us to do this. How can we send PP no nursing home? How can we stand the thought of her all alone, by herself, surrounded by people she don't even know? Can we?

***

But then, come to this stage, it is no longer whether can we or not. It's more for her comfort. We have to make decision on what is good for her. If we send her to a nursing home, she will be professionally taken care of and we can visit her anytime we want. It will be good for her. But then again, she might wanna spend the remaining days of her life at home, with people she love. How?

***

The best would be to hire a nurse and take care of her at home. But that gonna cost quite a lot of money which nobody are willing to share. Sigh...

***

Probably its because of all these that I don't have a mood to blog this entire week...

Kluang to visit PP

(Beautiful 'Gunung Lambak' partly covered by the low clouds)

Was back home in Kluang over the weekend to visit my ailing PP. She is once again back in the hospital, 3rd time for the last 4 months. This time round, it is due to the sudden rise of her sugar level. It was so high that all it was shown on the glucose machine was 'HI' instead of the normal numerical readings. According to the manual, when 'HI' is shown, whoever that is being tested need to be sent to the hospital immediately.

(inside Melor Ward)

So there she is, my PP, still in Melor Ward in our Kluang Hospital since 30th Dec. It is very sad and frustrating for all of us to see her trapped in a frail body that no longer functions. All that she is still able to do is opening & blinking her eyes. Even so, we are not sure she is able to see or hear anything cause she no longer response to us when we talked to her. We are not sure that the stroke has finally got her sight and hearing or that she just gave up. Every now and then, I will catch a tear formed in the corner of her eye. It makes my heart wrenched in pain.

(Beautiful green scenery of the army camp outside the ward)

Her kidneys are beginning to give way cause she looks kind of puffy and the colour of her urines are that of a very dark colour (almost bloody). Gangrenes beginning to form on both of her feet due to lack of blood circulation despite of constant massaging. It was a sad sight. There is absolutely nothing we can do except to pray for the Almighty to embrace her as soon as possible.

(releasing birds to freedom outside our home)

From time to time, mom would held PP’s hand and whisper into her ear stories from the good old time soothingly so that PP will not fear should her end comes. How we wish there is something that we could do to lessen her misery.

(mom releasing the birds)

We bought some birds from a local pet’s shop early this afternoon, released them to the wild and transferred the merits to PP. Hopefully, thru this, in some ways, we can at least help end her suffering a little sooner.

My New New Year

First day of 2009 started off quite early for me (that is by my standard la) cause I have a New Year breakfast appointment with a bunch of lovely ladies. The alarm went off at 8am but I only managed to drag myself out of bed 45 minutes later. Work also not so rajin...

(the lovely ladies & of course the cute Alex)

We met for dim sum breakfast at 9:30am at the Imperial China Restaurant in Subang Jaya. When I finally made my grand entrance at 9:38am, I quickly spotted the clan sitting cozily in one of the big table. Luckily for me, I am not the last. Good improvement on punctuality (not me of course, but them. I am just striving to be late so that they are early) lols...

(Florence & baby Alex - cute isn't him?)

One thing good that did happened this New Year is the reconciliation of some estranged friendship & family relations. Way to go girls! It was just a pity that An not able to join us this time round - rumours has it that she got in quite late the previous night and can't wake up in time.

It was a nice breakfast catching up with each other and gossipping without having yawning husbands around fighting hard not to fall asleep or children fighting for mommies' attention. It was just us, girls, and of course, baby Alex too. He has been such a darling throughout the two and a half hour breakfast session without a single whine (even though he pooped in his diaper).

By the time breakfast is over, it was already noon. Did some groceries shopping in Sri Kota and after that, got my hair done. Finally. Been wanting to do something to my hair for ages.

So, there I was, at the salon from 1:30 till 7:30pm. Freaking 6 hours. Sat till my bum bum also sored already. Not to say I have a lot of hair but just a miserable bunch of hair also need 6 hours to handle. It was like this...

Step 1: wash, blow dry & cut
Step 2: wash, blow dry, bleach old highlights & coloured based
Step 3: wash again, blow dry, highlights
Step 4: wash & blow dry

(the back of my hair done in orange highlights)

My hair never felt so clean in my entire life. 5 washes in a day. Have you have that too? My whole body ached for sitting too long. I told Belle (my hairstylist) that they should get those reclining chairs so that we can be in our dreamland while they work their magic on our mane. She said I am not the first to suggest. If I am not the first, then why am I still sitting on that most uncomfortable chair on earth???? lols..:p

(the front of my hairdone in cherry red)

After my 6 hours ordeal at the salon, I quickly rushed home to change for family dinner at this place called 'Cha Wong' (Tea King) in Kuchai Lama together. Besides the usual 6 of us, Harrison's aunties and cousins joined us too. It was a lovely dinner. I always love eating there. Their style of cooking is very unique.

Anyway, that's about what happened on my new year day. A new hairstyle, renewed family ties & friendship for a happy new year. :)